Here’s a picture of a boy to keep you entertained:

… although Susie has issues cutting limes…

So, long story short; train arrives in Aran at 11am, we get an easy Tuk Tuk to the border just past Rongklua Market, and we get deposited in a large car park, off a not-particularly-official-looking white building. Like cattle, we got hurried into the building and sat down by some “friendly” Thais (who kept fucking shouting “LOVELY JUBBLY” at us… Sigh) and presented with Cambodian entry forms. Which we filled out. In my defence, I didn’t feel particularly comfortable here - the visa signs on the Walls were more or less drawn on - but I assumed that it was mainly nerves on my behalf. The Thais then asked for our passports and 1000 baht (£20), and told us they were getting our Visas for Cambodia. Luckily, Susie also felt uncomfortable, but she had the guts to question what was going on - she’d read the you don’t get issued visas until you exit Thailand - at which, the Thai “Officials” got angry and threw the papers back at us. So, we left, feeling slightly relieved I might add, and walked down the road toward the border. We easily spotted the Thai immigration office, went in and got stamped out of Thailand.

Easy. 5 minutes.

We’d heard that it was best to get across to Cambodia immigration and get in line before 12 to beat the buses coming from the Khao San Road in Bangkok, as they’re usually packed, so we hurried to immigration and got in line again. Amazing, 3 people in front of us. Easy! It was only then that we learned that we didn’t buy visas here; we just get stamped in once we had them. So, we left in a bit of a panic, and walked back on ourselves, asking people for directions to the Visa office (many people offering to do them for us on the way I might add). Visa purchase went by easily, but the Khmer officials did try to charge us an “admin fee” of 100 baht (£2) each, to which we refused, but got our Visas anyway. So, back in line for stamps, we’d realised that while we were walking back and buying the Visas, the KSR buses had arrived. The line took 3 hours. Ouch.

The funniest thing about this whole crossing was the difference between both border towns; the second we got through in Cambodia, no longer were we presented by farms, rice paddies and trees, but barren sandy fields, dust and litter. Oh, and A MILLION SWARMING TOUTS TRYING TO SELL US EVERYTHING.

In short, here’s a brief guide on how to survive Aranyaprathet - Poipet border crossing.

1. Prebook a guest house in Siem Reap and ask them to get a taxi to pick you up. $40.

2. Arrive in Aran by train. It’s 48 baht (£1) from Huampulong train station in Bangkok.

3. At Aran, get a Tuk Tuk to the border for 60 baht. Negotiate if they try to put the price up, this is a standard price.

4. At the border - if you haven’t purchased E-visas - IGNORE EVERYONE and walk straight toward the border. DO-NOT go into ANY buildings unless they say IMMIGRATION. You can’t miss the the office, it’s on the left. Follow everyone else :)

5. Stamp out of Thailand

6. Walk about 2 minutes, under the large arch that looks like Angkor Wat. Immediately on the right, enter the official looking building filled with Cambodian officials in uniform, and buy your visa for $20. No more.

7. Walk out, continue down to Arrivals on the right.

8. Beat the KSR buses and queue for 5 minutes. Stamp in.

9. Put your head down, ignore EVERYONE (even police, as they’re just as eager to grab your cash as the touts) and find your prebooked taxi.

10. Win, and look back, laugh at everyone else who gets cattle shuttled into “free transport” buses.

Day 2: Driver: “Enjoy your temples” Me: “Kinda tired, but yeah sure. My feet are a bit bruised from wearing crap sandals and hiking 2km uphill, and I have a distinct lack of money from the fact that beggars are everywhere, but yeah; I’ll enjoy them. Even though they’re all starting to look the same.

Day 3: Driver: “Enjoy your temples” Me: